I can’t believe that I’m promoting a hot dog on this blog. (Of course, that means there’s a story coming…) I’ve been struggling to name this weird little hot dog/hoagie/hero thing. Whale of a dog? Umm. No. (No whales were used in the making of this sandwich.) The Seafarer? I’m sure it’s been done. I asked the kids…the Scurvy Dog?? Eww. And the Hubs contribution and my personal favorite: Sahlen for Seafood;) All fails. It might be nameless, but if you have to eat a hot dog, this is the one to choose.
So, short story…yesterday was my son’s birthday. You know how I feel about birthdays buuut Mr. Low Key wasn’t feeling it. He was in a great mood, but didn’t want to be fussed over. At all. Bummer. But he was going to be here for dinner, so I asked him what he wanted. Yup. You guessed it. Hot dogs. Gross. But it’s his birthday, so he gets what he wants. Out of 21 birthdays, I’m going to guess that he has chosen hot dogs for about 17 of them. So, I had a feeling this was coming.
A droll little anecdote… Picture this. You are sitting in morning program at the local public school. All the kiddos are being asked what they want to be when they grew up. All the parents are fondly smiling, as little Timmy clearly states that he’s going to be a professor, and little Tamika’s going to be an astronaut, and this one’s going to be a doctor, and she’s already accepted to Harvard Law. But wait. “Oh, you, little tyke, with the blonde hair over there…what do you want to be when you grow up?” A NYC hot dog vendor. Yep. Mine. That one’s mine.
He’s had an affinity for hot dog type foods since he was old enough to chew, and my father-in-law would sneak him Vienna sausages when I wasn’t looking. (Gag.) Thank God he outgrew his taste for those nasty little things, but he still loves an occasional hot dog. But, not just any hot dog, mind you. It’s got to be Sahlen’s. For those of you who haven’t heard of Sahlen’s, they are a Buffalo, NY treasure, if you can call a hot dog a treasure. The only one worth eating though, in my opinion, and the only one allowed in my house, if there’s has to be a hot dog in my house, at all. So we, obviously, went with that. As you know, on birthdays, I must fuss, but I also must respect his wishes if he says he doesn’t want me to. Dilemma. My solution was to make the hot dog a big deal, instead of the birthday. That’s a little weird. I just realized.
I say again, if I’m forced to eat a hot dog, it must be an epic hot dog. I didn’t want just any roll, so I looked and looked for something to strike my fancy, but nothing did. Then, as we were perusing the seafood aisle, I remembered the Cheddar Bay biscuit mix that the boys had leftover at home, so in a snap decision, choosing to pair it with pre-made seafood salad, and a shot of cocktail sauce, this Whale of a Seafarer, Sahlen for Seafood, Not Scurvy Dog was born. If you are a hot dog purist, this is not the dog for you. If you are a brave soul, the adventurous type, the captain of your own ship, here’s what you’re gonna need:
- 2 packets of Cheddar Bay Biscuit Mix
- Paprika
- Pre-Made Seafood Salad (or you can make your own)
- Sahlen’s Hot Dogs
- Cocktail Sauce
First you are going to make the biscuit mix into hot dog rolls. This is simple and fun. Mix water and cheddar cheese into 2 packets of mix, stir, and spoon onto a baking tray in a roll shape, and smooth the tops down, with a tiny bit of water. This could get a bit messy. Bake in 425 degree oven for about 10-12 minutes.
Grill Sahlen’s to preferred doneness. For me, that’s pretty much burnt. (Is burnt a word?)
When both are ready, fill Cheddar Bay Buns (that’s fun to say) with dogs and top with a heaping spoonful of seafood salad, sprinkle with paprika, and add cocktail sauce on the side. Yes, I know that seems like an odd combination, but it works! (If you are not a fan of hot dogs, like myself, cut it in half lengthwise and fill it mostly with seafood salad.) Take a giant bite and enjoy this strangely delicious nor’eastern experiment.
I’ve got it! The neptune. It shall forever be known as the King Neptune dog. No, maybe the Kraken. Yeah, that’s it. Now I am going to go make myself a detox smoothie, try to forget this monstrosity ever existed, and pray, to never again, have to type the words “hot” and “dog” together, in conjunction with this blog.
Have you tried Sahlen’s hot dogs? Do you think you can top this nautical dog? If you have different/better ideas, please share in the comments, or on insta@canigetaramen. Follow us on FB and pinterest @ canigetaramen.food.blog.
